Poison Ivy=Hand Herpes

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You Whale Watch? I Whale Hunt, Bitch.

Whale hunting is so much better. Especially when whale hunting in a submarine made of wood, rocks, and hot glue.

Do I Even Need to Explain?

You Bitch

I was greeted on Thursday by my inquiring Sculpting and Ceramics teacher asking me where I was a specific day.
Here's some background information. I am more often than not about 1 to 2 minutes late to my first hour, almost every day. I will leave her anonymous so let's call her Mrs. Jekyll. She marks me absent when I'm 2 minutes late and then says "I'm going to have to go back in and change it" good, you should change it.
Here's how it went down.
*Comes in about 3-5 minutes late*
Mrs. Jekyll: Where were you on Monday?
   Me: Monday was a snowday...
Mrs. Jekyll: Oh I meant Wednesday.
   Me: I was on a Physics field trip to Chicago. You signed a permission slip to let me go.
Mrs. Jekyll: Were you on time for your field trip?
   Me (thinking she was genuinely curious): I was actually half an hour early! I guess I move faster at 4:30 in the morning (hesitant hehe).
Mrs. Jekyll: Well maybe you should wake up at 4:30 so you can get to my class on time.
   Me: Uhhhh... (wanting to say "You Bitch." so hard)

Seriously? This is SCULPTING AND CERAMICS. Come on let's be serious here, no one is taking this class because they're going to be a sculptor, this class is a filler. I do understand how being late all the time can irritate a teacher but I think that as long as I show up and do the work and am on par with the rest of the class it should be fine. But my art teacher is a Nazi and that's not going to happen. I bow to you, one whose heart is made of the clay she so elegantly sculpts.

Things that make me violently angry

Here are some things that make me violently angry:
   -Crying children
Shut your child up! I went out to eat so I could enjoy the food not be to hear your ugly child cry and     wail!
   -People who do not use their blinkers
I can tolerate the "getting cut off" because I assume that the cutter-offer simply did not see me, however, if you do not use your blinker I want to bludgeon you with a bowling ball. I mean seriously, all you have to do is pull down/up on a stupid lever!
   -Fox News
Fox News... is there really anything else to say?
   -People who think they know politics
You know everything about politics? That's really weird because you're 16. You may not like the person in office but by saying he/she is "ruining our country" without giving any intellectual reasons makes me want to cut out your eye.
   -Homework over breaks
Really? This "analyze the article" is so important that I need to do it over my Christmas Break? Well I hate you. I'm not going to do it.

I will add more once I come up with more. If I don't that means I forgot.

If I Could Fly

I've been asked many questions many times. One of my favorite is: "If you could have one superpower what would it be?" Well for starters how dare you bring up something that I have always wanted (superpowers) when you know fully well that I will never be able to attain them. Asshole. But if I had to choose a superpower it would have to be the power of flying. Not angelic flying with the wings because that would take too much effort. Even though I want angelic wings. I prefer the superman flying. But then I began thinking of what could happen if I didn't have anything to help me whilst flying.

This is the typical flying that I would do. But then I realized something.

What if there were bugs?

Then I found the solution! An umbrella!

Dear Game Developers

Dear Game Developers:
Yes, I would like to retry.
P.S. Make it a little bit harder.

Also I hate you.